I had an epiphany this morning. I found something that Grendel didn’t want to eat. Now don’t get me wrong, we’ve been through the puppy phase and he’s come out of that pretty well and avoids some of the random things he used to eat, but he still counter surfs and eats some bizarre stuff. So naturally I was blown away after seeing what was left on the coffee table this morning.
He did not touch the banana. Bananas not only are food but they are loaded with sugar, something he definitely likes. I’m thinking that maybe I should take him to the vet. After all, he will pretty much try anything including:
75 Advil tablets.
He once grabbed a bottle off the counter, chewed through it and barely survived. Cost me a bundle that one did.
Dead fish and random seaweed.
You got to watch the pups when they are young and first go to the beach. The stuff comes out eventually. Yuck.
Drywall and a plastic electrical socket cover.
I can only imagine that he was sticking his tongue in the socket getting shocked and just not realizing the connection. What a huge dumb—.
Arthritis cream.
I put this horrible product on my hand once. It practically burned my skin off but for some reason he gave it a go. I found it on the kitchen floor with the packaging all torn off and the tube chewed open.
Cold ice pack.
You know those gel packs that you stick in your freezer and use for sprains? I left one out on the coffee table the other night only to come home the next day to see a corner of it ripped open. Yum!
Books.
When the Grendel dog was a puppy he took out half my graduating class in my yearbook. He also destroyed my chemistry and anatomy books from college. I didn’t care as much about them but I did have to throw out some others. I guess he thought knowledge was power and eating it would be good.
I won’t mention the other gross stuff he still eats (I have two cats in the house—just saying). So now we can add bananas to lettuce and carrots as his no-go items. What is the weirdest thing your dog has eaten?
March 12, 2011 at 10:23 pm
These are hilarious! Enjoyable reading. Keep it up.