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September 12, 2012

A time to weep and a time to laugh.

Posted by Grendel's Mother under God, laughter, Love, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , |
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Milestones mark our time. I’m not sure why we mark time like that—maybe to organize our lives, remember important life-changing events, or because we need to put something in perspective? Sometimes that may be good—like giving parents a sense of how and what lessons to teach their children (e.g., financial responsibility in high school vs. when they are 40). Sometimes I think it’s not so good—expecting to achieve certain goals because you have reached a certain time in your life.

I’m just saying, time is weird and it’s “relative.” For me, the past six months have been sad and stressful. There have been moments of love and laughter and hope as well. But the time since my brother passed seems like an eternity and yesterday at the same time. As I arrive at a milestone, or pass by a place where we made a fun memory, or come to a day we celebrated during the year, the grief comes back like a truck that hits me all over again.

I’ve been told by many who have lost loved ones that this grief period goes on for quite awhile. I guess that’s so we remember how precious life is and how important our loved ones are. I really miss my family and the fun things we’d do together on weekends, but I hope with time that they (and me) can heal and remember Greg without crying too hard. Seriously, I really should buy stock in Kleenex.

Well, yesterday was an anniversary of September 11 and today I am thinking about my family and my brother, and my friends who are also grieving or facing a big challenge. But I don’t want you to leave this blog feeling all boo—yucky and pathetically sad. So, I’ll leave you with something to hopefully make you smile and know that “He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy.” Job 8:21

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 (A Time for Everthing)

 

August 22, 2012

Hello lampost. What’cha knowin?

Posted by Grendel's Mother under God, social media, Uncategorized | Tags: , , |
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One of the things I find fascinating about God is how he communicates with me. There are times when all around me I see and hear messages that I feel come from Him—sometimes through people I know, sometimes through strangers, sometimes on a billboard, and of course, through the Word. I know there are skeptics out there and yes, I could be completely wrong about what I am interpreting but I do know that He is always right and I believe He is trying to talk to me and comfort me.

So when I do stop all the worry and stop filling my head and life with useless things, I can sometimes get a clue or maybe just a feeling of support and encouragement. Like today. I’m reading facebook and see a post from my pastor, Mark Batterson, who wrote about slowing down in our fast-paced society. I loved the scripture he posted—so relevant to what I need right now. “Be still and know that I am God.” –Psalm 46:10. Pastor Mark says, “If you’re working too much and not taking a Sabbath, it probably means you’re trying to play God.” Yup, guilty. Not that I’m working too hard but being too busy and getting stuck in that stress loop inside my head means I’m not listening or giving my problems over to God and therefore wallowing in worry.

So a few moments after reading that post, I move on to the “daily message from God” app on facebook. I love to read it because it always seems like it’s very relevant to what I need to hear at that moment. Today’s message read, “On this day of your life, Dawn, we believe God wants you to know … that when whispers do not get your attention, bricks will fly your way. Don’t speed through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention. Slow down and be present.”

Hmmm. Two messages within the hour telling me to slow down and be still. You’d think I would have learned how to do that from my cats. They have the amazing capacity to remain still for hours on end. Maybe that’s why they seem so content. In any case, my point is, I think it’s one of those things that if you’re a believer, you can see the wonderful ways God chooses to communicate his love for us. He’s a hipster, our heavenly Dad. He invented the Internet and social media and uses them just like the ancient people used stone tablets and papyrus. Maybe He wants me to use foursquare so  I stop and mark where I am and look around at my surroundings instead of zoning out. Or maybe I should turn off my iPhone altogether and have a real conversation with the people around me. Being me, that is terrifying unless they are friends, so that particular activity will take some work.

Either way, I’m pausing now to write this. And I think I’ll put on a smile and tell myself that He is in control until I calm down and believe it. Looks like a beautiful day out today! Enjoy it (and then tweet a nice photo so we can share in your fun.)

P.S. If you’re wondering about the title of this post and not sure why I used it for this topic, then listen to the song lyrics in this video of The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy).

And speaking of social media…one of my favorite sites, I can has cheezburger, or LOL cats, now offers users the ability to create their own pages. So naturally I have. Visit my new cheezburger page at http://grendelsmom.cheezburger.com/.

 

March 4, 2012

Agape, Eros, Philia, Storge, Xenia…what’s in a name?

Posted by Grendel's Mother under God, kindness, Love | Tags: , , |
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Now that Valentine’s Day has come and gone, I can talk about real love. I say that because I’m an anti-Valentine’s day kind of person. Now, hold your judgment for one minute while I explain. I actually love romance. I’m a hopeless romantic. But to me, stamping a date on a calendar that puts pressure on men to deliver something special takes the fun and the romance out of the equation. We’ve commercialized this romantic love into a special love-day package. Step one; make reservations at a restaurant where they have a special meal including dessert and wine at a neatly packaged price. Step two; buy a bouquet of flowers and some chocolate (or if you’re a lucky girl, some major bling). Step three; smile, and know that any responsibility or creativity in displaying your love and feelings for your wonderful girlfriend has been taken care of for you so any real intimate sentimentality or originality has been squashed.

Me? I want to know that my true Love is thinking about me at random times during the day when we are apart. I want him to show me that—in his own unique way—be it a text, a flower on a random day, a note that shows he’s been paying attention to what’s important to me, or maybe just a smile and a kiss when we are standing in line. Romance for me is that he knows I hate calling repairmen to come fix things so he does that for me without asking. That he knows I love to watch Downton Abby so he stays quiet during the episode and records it for me if I’m going to miss it. Or that he listens when I rant and doesn’t always try to fix what’s wrong, just supports me and lets me know he’s on my side and there for me. That’s love to me. That’s romance. Oh, and a quiet lovely vacation on a secluded beach “don’t stink much neether.”

But let’s talk about love in general—not just romantic love. Love has many meanings, both in the dictionary and to each individual. It is the most talked about subject on the planet and for good reason. Want to know why we are here? It’s to love. To love each other and to love our creator, God.

One of the things that made me know I was on the right track when I finally put my faith in Christ was that all the questions I was having about things I didn’t understand in the Bible and in the world were put aside as something that I could trust God about and that would be revealed to me later (or not). Why could I trust Him? Faith. But also because Jesus told us what we really need to remember.

“Love one another; just as I have loved you, you are to love one another.”

He said “love” three times in one sentence and since Jesus didn’t stutter, I’m pretty sure he was emphasizing the word, love.

All of us—Christians and non Christians alike could use a dose of this every morning. A daily reminder of how wonderful the world would be if we first chose to love.

I was listening to the radio the other day and the speaker I was listening to said we are living in an “I” world. There’s the iPhone, the iPad, iTunes…you get my drift. He said we need to get out of that thinking and start helping each other. Interesting thought.

So, how to start.

Well, for me, I’ll start by not getting upset at the other drivers on my way to work tomorrow morning. I’ll look in the eye of the guy with his hand out and give him at the very least my respect and concern. I’ll pray for the people who hurt me and my family and friends and boldly ask God to turn their hearts toward love. And I’ll keep looking for my allusive true Love. But in the meantime am very blessed and thankful for the love of my family and friends.

 

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