From the Observation Deck

The list. Hmmmm. World peace. Snow. Eradication of hunger, poverty, and violence. All noble and worthy dreams. But let’s talk about the wrapped stuff. I like giving presents and seeing wrapped packages with pretty paper and bows beneath the tree. I love seeing stockings full of fun little stuff.

It’s the shopping and traffic and lines that most of us don’t like. That’s why I heart the Internet.

Kknnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn]]]]ktree

 My apologies—that last line of nonsense is what happens when you leave the laptop open and the cat sits on the keyboard. I’m not sure if I’m freaked out or not that she actually spelled out tree at the end. It could be a coincidence but the cats do love the Christmas tree. They sit underneath it and pretend that it shields them from view. But I digress.

I was talking about the fun of exchanging gifts. Last year I was feeling a bit Grinchy but this year I’m feeling like Tiny Tim. I’m breaking out the credit card and hitting the mall. Or most likely Amazon. What do I want this year? I’ve already got it. A loving family, great friends, a job, and the possibility of some snow. But if you really want to give me something that’s wrapped, I’m okay with that, too. Happy shopping.

Which present should I play with first?

Thursday, November 26, 2009, Thanksgiving Day

• 9 a.m.

Leave house in VA. In Maryland, traffic starts to build so I take route 1 up through old towns and farms.

• 11 a.m.

I cross the Conowingo Dam. I save five bucks taking the back roads and it’s fun, try it sometime. Shortly after the dam I pass by US route 1 Bakery. Its marquee says to become a fan on Facebook. I’m fascinated that a tiny business in the middle of nowhere is marketing itself so well. Later I visit the FB page and become a fan.

• 11:45 a.m.

I arrive at my parent’s house in Pennsylvania.

• 12 noon

We commence eating snacks because its hours before the Turkey will be ready.

• 12 noon–3 p.m.

Talked to family, wrestled with kids, read, and snoozed in parent’s awesome recliner.

• 12 noon–11 p.m.

The kids all fed Grendel snacks and he licked up any random spilled food that fell on the floor throughout the day.

• 3 p.m.

Thanksgiving dinner.

• 4 p.m.

Went with family to old elementary school to play basketball and play on playground.

• 6 p.m.

Played Apples to Apples. Young Tyler pronounced one of his cards that said Catsup, “Cat soup” which we thought was pretty funny considering Tyler didn’t think twice about a soup containing any kind of ingredient that was cat related. Later he mispronounced Pinocchio as “Poncho.” His dad and I joked that this Poncho must be the famous Mexican kid who had issues telling the truth.

• 7 p.m.

Ate pie.

• 8 p.m.

Watched a movie and had to explain half of it to those who weren’t patient enough to just watch it and figure it out. Yikes.

 Friday, November 27

• 1 a.m.

Cleaned up dog puke. Cursed kids who fed the dog snacks all day long.

• 8:30 a.m.

Kids made lots of noise and kept me from precious sleep time.

• 9:30 a.m.

Mom decides to play piano.

• 9:33 a.m.

I yell down the stairs and ask mom to wait until a more reasonable hour to play the piano. She apologizes and says she forgot I was there. I go back to bed happy about the quiet but not so okay with mother forgetting my presence in her house.

• 11 a.m.

Went to bowling alley. Saw a sign that said it closed last June. I wanted to go to Charcoal Pit for lunch but was out-voted. Instead we went to a family fun center. We played arcade games and history’s fastest game of miniature golf—possible due to the freezing weather.

• 1 p.m.

Family went to snooty golf course where V.P. Biden is a member. Didn’t see him and was denied service because we were wearing jeans. Turned out okay though because we then went to Subway and got yummy sandwiches where clothes were not an issue.

• 3 p.m.

Mom and I followed my nieces through the woods, across a stream to a pond. We then went back through the woods and across the stream—twice. Along with having to bend in awkward stances, jump on rocks and over mud, we collected prickles all over our clothes. I am still aching and will never blindly follow teenagers through the woods again.

• 7 p.m.

Hot bath

• 7:30 p.m.

Played Monopoly with the kids.

• 8 p.m.

Monopoly not going well so we put in another movie.

• 10 p.m.

Bed

 Saturday, November 28

• 9:05–9:20 a.m.

Awoke abruptly to repeated siren noises from fire alarm in kitchen.

• 10:30 a.m.

Off to the bowling alley with the family.

• 12:30 p.m.

After soundly defeating the nieces, I join the family for lunch at McDonalds.

• 5 p.m.

I arrive back in VA and proceed to enjoy a nice quiet, hot bath, and then some sleep.