From the Observation Deck

So awhile back I posted a funny strip from Dilbert. Here is it again.

I posted it as a joke after I got laid off to keep my spirits high and to keep laughing. Well, today, as luck (or unluck rather—is that a word?) would have it, I saw my life flash before my eyes as a flying mattress came hurling toward me on the beltway.

Anyone who has ever driven on the DC beltway knows that you take certain risks just being on it. But I can honestly say flying mattresses were not on the list of things I keep my eye out for when rounding the outer loop.

But today, as I was happily lost in thought on my way home from getting my locks colored and cut, I saw two mattresses flying off the hood of a car about 100 yards in front of me. The good news is I own a Honda, not a Toyota, so the brakes worked and thanks be to God, who is really looking after us, no one got hurt.

My dad has most likely lost the color in his face reading this but I had to post about it to remind all of you to keep on your toes. If you’re keeping your money stashed in your mattresses, make sure they are secure on the hood of your cars or you might just lose everything!

One year ago today I was laid off from my job. It was a truly horrible day. I called my parents and started crying into the phone and didn’t stop all night. In between sobs I downed a few glasses of wine but didn’t care seeing how I had the whole next day to sleep it off. Man, what a crappy thing it is to lose your job.

I like to think I’m of the philosophy that things happen for a reason. God has a plan for me and I believe it. Sometimes trials and tribulations make us stronger and test our character. I’m not sure what it did for me. I hated it and it stunk. But I do know that I’m now working for a great company that’s growing. The people I work with are talented, friendly, and fun. I’m working harder (it seems) than I have in awhile and I am still dealing with stress issues but I will always be grateful for my job.

You probably know someone who is out of work right now. Or maybe they’ve been furloughed or given up or have taken a job that’s not quite up to what they could be doing. You don’t have to do anything special for them because unless you’ve been through it you won’t understand. But what you can do is listen and be their friend. Don’t treat them differently (except I will say don’t throw your recent purchases in their face or suggest shopping sprees). Invite them over, have a few laughs, and keep trying to help them network so they can find potential opportunities. And pray.

I’m still a little gun shy and sometimes nervous about the future but I’m moving on. I’ve refinanced (thanks to being employed), I’m taking a break to Nova Scotia this summer with my parents (something that was on the books for last summer), and I’m saving my pennies for a promising, hopeful future.

But in conclusion, I just want to say to all of you still out of work—we haven’t forgotten you. We still care and we’ll be here for you. Good luck!

I love spending time with my family. I always seem to get good fodder for this blog. My mom came up from her winter stay in Florida to visit the kids so I went up to my brother’s house for the day to see everyone. The fun part of visiting the kids is the verbal game of dodge ball where I avoid weird and uncomfortable questions and comments.

After arriving, my brother Greg, my mom, and my nephew and I take Grendel for a walk. As Greg and I were talking, Tyler, my nine-year old nephew asks me, “Aunt Dawn, I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but I want to ask you a question. Why aren’t you married? I’m just asking because I want an Uncle.” I redirected the conversation and thought I’d managed to sufficiently blow that one off until he asked again later. I told him that a) he already has an Uncle—his mother’s brother, and b) if I had a husband, said husband would keep all the Wii games that I buy for Tyler. That was the end of that discussion.

Then later, when we were in the car, Tyler says, “Why are there suspicious people dressed in dark clothing like Muslims, at Niagara Falls?” Don’t know where that one came from but I’m sure those deep thoughts are a result of some enlightened view of the world. Or not.

My other nephew, Harmon, always manages to provide some zingers. When he was younger he told me that he “was cute because he was the littlest.” And he once said to his whole family, “everyone who loves me, raise your hand.” That is officially my favorite line ever and I tease him about it relentlessly.

Harmon’s latest obsession is with guns. It used to be light sabers but we’ve moved on to a different form of violence. While eating lunch at Subway, a police officer came in. Harmon’s face lit up when he saw the cop’s gun. I encouraged Harmon to go talk to him. When we asked Harmon what he would say to the cop, he replied, “I’ll tell him I’m a big fan and I love your gun.”

God makes them cute and inquisitive to keep us on our toes. So, what was the funniest thing your kid ever said?