From the Observation Deck

So last weekend I attended an HOA meeting for my beach house community. Honestly these people are the epitome of the crazy, motion-happy, spend-happy, too-much-time-on-their-hands dysfunctional community. You’ve probably heard the HOA horror stories and I’m here to tell you that these crazy things actually happen. Many communities are healthy but this is not one of them. I don’t know how many times there were endless comments made about a motion and then after 15 minutes one of these bozos would say, “What’s the motion?”

It’s sad really because I am so frustrated by the ridiculousness of these people I cannot and will not attend any more of these meetings. Yes, I am giving up on democracy as it relates to this HOA. Seriously, how long do you think a conversation about a ramp that some crazy bat wants built should take? Five years and two hours? Yup. The construction contractor came and was so frustrated he was about to fire us as a customer. I wish he would have. Then maybe I wouldn’t have had to sit through 26 minutes of the slope ratio and drainage discussion.

So enough. Next year I’m abstaining and enjoying the beach—before the board makes us pay a toll to cross the dunes. Some of you may be saying, well then get involved if you want to change it. I saw another guy try that. He’s a good guy, reasonable, well-liked, and did a good job. These people drove him to quit. So I’ll keep my sanity and let them squabble over the size of the trees near the gate that costs thousands of dollars and gets left open all winter. I will say one more thing. If they tell me I can’t take my afternoon daiquiri on to the beach, I will lead a rebellion and it won’t be pretty. So there. All in favor? Aye!

I’m watching an exciting first match of the Stanley Cup Finals. I checked Facebook earlier and of course there were cheers, waves, and shout outs. And because my friends are intelligent and enlightened, there were many well wishes for the Flyers.

Our boys are keeping up but they had me shouting something nasty when they let the Blackhawks score shorthanded. That’s a no-no and if they were in Philly the fans would have let them know they won’t be putting up with that. Flyers games are really fun to attend in person. I remember being at a game once and thinking after the first ten minutes that the team was moving slow, getting beat to the puck, and generally stinking up the ice. I wasn’t alone. The next minute what started as a low rumble-like sound escalated into full blown boos from the crowd. I’ve been a Philadelphia fan for a long time but even I was a bit shocked. Just for a second though. Because my hard earned dollars were paying to see those boys work for the win.

Whether they win or lose tonight I’m proud of them. (Except that shorthanded goal thing earlier—let’s forgive but not forget.)

Tune in on Monday night for game two. And until then, sing along…

There is just something special about playoff hockey. The checks are a little bit harder, the skating is faster, and the puck handling and passing is like watching a ballet of sorts. The goaltending is superb. In fact, you really can’t win the holy grail of hockey—the Stanley Cup—without superior goaltending. And finally, the boys all look extra gruffy. There’s an unwritten rule that hockey players don’t shave during the playoffs. Those boys are so superstitious they make gypsies look like conservative pragmatists.

I used to work for a hockey team. And I did some internship work for the Flyers Skate Zone. That meant going to all the Flyers and Phantoms’ home games, sitting in incredibly awesome seats, and working a table during the intermissions. During my stint in sports, I met some famous people, slipped on the ice once or twice, narrowly missed being caught in fights, and fractured my hand after being hit by a puck going, oh, maybe 90 miles an hour. It almost hit my face, so I count my blessings. Funny thing was—I got to claim worker’s comp for that.

Anyhoo. My all time favorite team in my favorite sport is in the Stanley Cup Finals. The Flyers won Lord Stanley’s Cup a couple of years back in the 70’s. That team was called the “Broad Street Bullies” and Philly loved them. A few years later, my dad took us to a game and I was hooked. I managed to convince him to get us some season tickets. So my dad and I would go to the games together, and sit in the first row of the nosebleed section. It was awesome. I’m glad he wore headphones to hear the play-by-play because the guy sitting next to us threw the f-bomb around like … well a Philadelphia fan would.

I’m calling on all my friends to root for the orange and black. Here’s to the Broad Street Boys! Let’s go Flyers, let’s go!

P.S. I’ve gotten to kiss the cup. Twice. Visit the hockey hall of fame and you can see it too!

Flyers Fan Zone. All are welcome.